push ugly thoughts to the back of your mind

Today is a depressing day.
Especially when it got to the end of the day. Cause so many bad things happened.
During mother tongue lesson, i made olivia REALLY mad. Cause i broke her drawing crayon pencil thing. Then i tried to make it better by cracking lame jokes about breaking it. Apparently it made it worse. (i'm bad at this) (oh yeah,later on, adina was like: you look flustered. olivia ignores her. adina: I SAID, you look flustered! olivia ignores her again. I think to myself, you;re being stupid to say that kind of things. then suddenly, SHE FANS olivia with her paper. haha, and i start laughing, uncontrollably. but i think to myself: I'm an actress, I'm an actress, and I regain composure.)
After that, i didnt feel like studying at the learning lab anymore, so i wanted to go home, and i called my mummy. And, she asked me to call my sister (Cause my sister was at the bus stop already) so i did that, but my sister did not want to be fetched cause she felt bad. Then I said ok and hung up, but inside, i was really irritated, cause by the time i reached the bus stop, I would have missed MY bus. So annoyed, i walked past the stairs leading to the back of the hall. Then, i was talking to Jesus (that's what I do) and the conversation went like this:
"Why don't you just punish me for breaking Olivia's pencil, and make me miss my bus. Then I can make my sister feel bad about it, and olivia will forgive me." (so angry.)
And just as i said this. i fell.
I usually dont fall. But i fell.
And it wasn't a graze, it was like, WOAH.
I quickly get up, and i look at my wound, and, there is this big oval of white.
I felt disgusted and upset, cause my leg will have a big scar.
I walked back to the toilet, and Natalie accompanied me, only thing is that i was so irritated, i walked faster than her.
Then by the time i got to the bus stop, i was feeling sad and angry. Cause I don't want my leg to be scarred, and i felt irritated that i said such a lousy prayer. so i sniffed. (you can't consider this as crying.) But anyway, this primary school girl i think? she saw me, and she thought i was crying over the wound. and she was looking at me like i can't tolerate pain. well just so you know, i can. I CAN. Then i went up the bus, and everyone was looking at me, and i dont know what they were thinking. but i walked very clumsily, cause i didnt want to touch the handles (dirty) but i had a bad leg. so i couldnt walk properly.
Listened to Vienna boys.
Then I called my sister to apologize for hanging up. (i messaged but she didnt reply)
BAD DAY.
oh well, in the end, olivia forgave me(yey), and my sister and mummy ended up feeling really bad because they think they're to blame for my ugly wound. and I ended up feeling bad that they felt bad, cause it wasnt their fault.
ironies of LIFE.